Claude Hay
"Get Me Some" (mp3)
from "Deep Fried Satisfied"
(Ingot Rock)

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Part Two of the marathon recording session that took place a week ago.  Please keep in mind that this episode takes place in the middle of that nearly 6 hour session.  At the point that this particular show begins, we had been recording ourselves for almost 3 hours.  We had reached a point due to the time of night, the length of time already spent and the amount of alcohol consumed that we almost completely forgot we were recording at all.  Listen carefully to the show and it will be obvious that as it goes on we do indeed get drunk and drunker.  Most of the rambling was cut out and I hope the end product is as enjoyable to listen to as it was to put on disk.  We had a good time and hope you will too.

The show begins with a replaying of the intro, which sounds natural, but at the time was more of a joke.  This leads to bad singing, mainly because we were drunk.  A simple question from Biscuit to Jefe leads to some Watersports discussion and the recommendation that Cousin Dave have his wife pee on his feet.  Zen sees the show spiraling out of control and tries to rein it in by introducing some news stories.  After a quick review of a San Jose Badminton coach who makes students fondle his shuttlecock, we argue over this news story in the Chicago Tribune that ranks the 10 sexiest accents in the world.  The arguments reveal an interesting group dynamic that occurs frequently during the rest of the show.  Jefe and Biscuit Ray tend to agree on things, while Zen and Cousin Dave tend to see eye to eye.  Not a hard and fast rule, but usually that's how it more or less shakes out.

The consensus in the room is that the two sexiest accents are Midwestern American and Spanish.  The Tribune does NOT agree, placing them at the bottom of the list and putting this accent at the number one spot:

Muse takes us through the first break with a little Starlight.

We continue with a couple more news stories.  A Swindon farmer has trouble keeping her melons on the vines so has a clever idea for supporting them with bras.  Guess which size bra works best.  Then a depressing story of the worlds largest breast implants being removed leads into a discussion of which kind of "guy" each of us are.  Hint:  two boob guys, one booty guy and one face guy.  You probably know which is which.

Jonathan Coulton takes us through the second break with his version of Sir Mix a Lot's Baby Got Back.

Professor Van der Liquor briefly joins the cast to attempt to scientifically explain where the show went wrong.  Zen tries to use some pictures of porn stars to cheer everyone up.  We desperately turn to the "IF" book and play the Renaming Game.  Some Star Wars Incest talk.  Cousin Dave explains The Smurfs.  Jefe reveals an embarrassing childhood secret involving the movie Good Burger.  We argue over the Worst Movie Ever Made.  Six Degrees of Jefe Smythe.

Roger Clyne and the Peacemakers play King of the Hill for the third break song.

We do Facebook Shout Outs and play some voicemails.  We try to answer Destin Kerr's question.  The Dumbest things we've ever done to impress chicks.  Hint:  riding a bike with no hands, Polish Arm Wrestling, racing into a fireplace and Ray's Sexy Wiener Dance.

We finish the show with two videos.  A review of I Hate You When You're Pregnant's song Sleeveless leads into a viewing of the Internet Meme video "Techno Viking"

The show closes with the song Fireworks.

Polock
"Fireworks" (mp3)
from "Getting Down From The Trees"
(Nacional Records)

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Triskaidekaphobia.  It means "fear of the number 13."  We honestly should have had a healthy respect for triskaidekaphobia, because episode 13 turned out to be a wild ride.  We welcomed back Cousin Dave into the studio, and he had a young'un in tow.  Dave dragged longtime voice mail contributor Jefe into the Double D Studio to add to the mayhem.  This new group dynamic resulted in many spectacular unforeseen results, not the least of which were:  a Skype call that went on way too long and that expanded temporarily the cast to 8 persons, an impressive amount of alcohol being consumed and last but certainly not least a total of almost 6 hours of raw audio being recorded.  Some of it was good, some of it was really horrible, but in the end it was more than enough to create two episodes from.  This is Part ONE.

We began with what we were drinking that night.  Jefe started with Thelonius Monk Abbey Ale and then moved on to Heineken.  Cousin Dave began with Sparks alcoholic energy drink and then moved on to Tap Room 21.  Biscuit Ray began with some leftover Fosters and then moved on to trying a little of everything else and Zen began the night with Saporro, the Japanese beer brewed in Canada.  We all toasted the beginning of the recording with a shot of Captain Morgan's Private Stock Rum.

Topics of Discussion:  Lady Gaga concerts.  An Oakland A's Superfan.  "Vag Out."

Link to the Superfan picture, so you can see what we're talking about: Click Here

 Some sports talk.  Bills and Beaks.  Jefe and the Goat.  Ray needs some Strange.  Chicharonnes (again.)

First Break Song:

Dirt Nasty
"1980" (mp3)
from "Dirt Nasty"
(Shoot to Kill Music, Inc.)

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The Question of the Day.  How much money would it really take?  (Indecent Proposal)  Demi Moore's shrubbery.  Jefe recalls the underwear party.  We pursue to the bitter end a really bad idea:  we skype call Rocky and Laughing Girl at midnight.  Rocky answers the Day's question.  The transitive property of equality AKA the long way around to going down on Angie.

Second Break - Reel Big Fish

The Skype call continued.  The Asian and the Indian.  Racism ensues.  The call ends abruptly.  The Jalisco Market.  FALA and fellatio.  Jefe displays his leadership.  Aborted singing of Hooked on a Feeling.  His Face Rings a Bell.  Scissoring is for Old People.  A sort of voice mail from Special Ed.

End Song - Ben Folds Five

At this point in the night we had already been recording for almost 3 hours.  I jokingly played the intro again and told the guys I would scrap all the previously recorded audio and we would just start over.  Serendipity!  This became a natural point to seperate the recording into two episodes, so look for Part TWO of Triskaidekaphobia next week!

So we've reached a small milestone.  A Dozen Down.  While twelve may not mean a lot to other podcasts, it means something to us.  'Cause we're Double D.  

Anyway, this episode covers a wide range of Double D topics, from Dyson Dolls to Dudes with Down's and some Drunk Dialing.  It all begins with what we're drinking this episode.  Foster's.  Australian for Beer.  What is the constellation on Australia's flag and also the Foster's label?  Paul Hogan's cock.  "That's not a cock.  That's a cock."  Cousin Dave text-interrupts the podcast.  Nefarious Ten Pin Imperial Porter, courtesy of Ska Brewing.  How many ounces are in a pint?  Cousin Dave gets Hooked on a Feelin'.  Seth Rogen sings along with Lady Gaga.  Video Proof:

T Shirt sales. We got 'em. Order the new "Jefe likes his Double D" T at CafePress. For every shirt sold we got a hot dollar. Support the show!

First Break Song:

Suarez
"Stacy" (mp3)
from "Tokyo Rose"
(HOME Records)

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We start the next segment with a small description of the Nefarious Ten Pin Imperial Porter.  It is a beer as black as the Devil's Heart, but smooth as anything you've ever drank.  We discuss bringing back the old "Free Mustache Rides" T shirt.  And then we launch into the great Dyson Vacuum Blowjob Doll Debate.  Zen shares yet another embarrassing childhood story.  This one is not so bad, fortunately.  The Electrolux and the Bonefinger.  Carwash vacuums and a well manicured bush.

Next Break Song:

Ford
"Logical" (mp3)
from "Logical"
(Ford Productions, LLC)

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"Super Pooswah" makes an unexpected entrance.  The JDSI and it's incredible Down's Syndrome Ad Campaign.

Aim High or Aim High Enough.  (note:  since the recording of this podcast we have learned to our embarrassment that this is actually taken from a quote by John Langdon Down, the doctor for whom the condition is named.  It has to do with "when you take aim, aim high enough" and is actually quite inspiring.  We don't regret goofing on it, however, and will still make some sort of T shirt)  Being "a little downy."  Mace the Ace and My Girl.

Last Break Song:

Libyans
"Paralyzed" (mp3)
from "A Common Place"
(Sorry State Records)

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The final segment is the Voice Mail segment.  Jefe, Rocky, Sierra Unpronouncable and Laughing Girl all check in from the underwear party.  We argue over the best snack to have with beer and Ray proves he's not a real mexican.  Every mexican has a bottle of hot sauce on his person at all times.  Finally, yet another horribly racist joke from Biscuit Ray.

Closing song:

Se�±or Coconut
"Electrolatino" (mp3)
from "Fiesta Songs"
(Nacional Records)

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Thanks for listening and please tell a friend, enemy or random stranger about the show!  Tell them to visit this website and be sure to "like" us on Facebook at facebook.com/doubledpodcast.

Where to begin . . . first off, we'd like to apologize for the week off that we took seemingly for no reason at all, and also for the smallness of this episode.  It can all be explained away by the fact that Zen . . . well, is kinda dumb.  Last month's shows were released in a haphazard manner and left us with no storage space on our server at the end of the month.  We had just enough room to squeeze this smallish release in, but rest assured that this will never happen again.  We are back on a regular recording schedule and shows will come out weekly and at their regular length starting next week.

This show is definitely worth checking out, however.  The show, like a finely tuned podcasting racecar, goes from zero to porn in 3.6 minutes.  What's the deal with "quickies" . . . and are men predisposed to liking quickies through years of speed masturbating?  Of course.

Ray has a new lady friend.  We may have mentioned her in previous episodes of The Zen and Peace Show.  We'll have to give her a new nickname because, amazingly enough, Ray hasn't completely screwed things up (yet.)  So for now we'll call her "Bleepie Baby"  The reason will be clear enough once you here the show.

If you've recently become a fan on our Facebook page (located at facebook.com/doubledpodcast) then you get your shoutout during this episode.  If you haven't joined our page and gotten your shoutout yet, head on over.  You're only a "like button" click away.

Jefe Smythe, our most prolific caller inner, graces us with 4 more drunken voice mails.  Tales from open auditions for American Idol and plenty of inebriated singing.  The Hoff never sounded so good.

We'll talk at ya next week.  If you're in the area and are going to the Coconino County Fair this weekend, keep your eyes peeled.  Maybe we'll see you there.  If you have anything to say about the Fair, or Fairs and Carnivals in general, give us an email or a call.